Tuesday, 6 September 2016

Let's Get This Party Started

I am by no means uncritical of Black Lives Matter.

Although, like so many things, its loudest detractors are far worse that it is, and they do not even mean what they are saying, but instead enjoy being on television and controlling the minds of the less accomplished.

James Delingpole was on The Daily Politics again today. Milo Yiannopoulos was on Radio Four last week. Radio Four! Milo Yiannopoulos!

As ever, Delingpole was grinning and giggling throughout the whole thing. But there are people who take him with absolute seriousness.

Still, I digress.

From this very desk, right here in Lanchester, I have arranged for people to be visited at home in Manhattan by New York's more vigorous anti-racist campaigning organisations.

No one thus visited, however, had ever called me a "mulatto", or said that my being so disqualified me from being a district councillor.

I do feel genuinely sorry for Neil Fleming.

Months short of 40, he has never been employed outside politics, but no one who matters tuppence in the Labour Party now will ever have heard of him.

Whereas they make beelines for me at funerals. Yes, including Himself.

In 10 years' time, or possibly even in five, I can see myself arranging for someone or other to pay him the equivalent of the basic allowance on the old Derwentside District Council, which in spite of everything he never got.

Just to keep him off the street.

But there would be none of that if he had shown his face during next year's local elections.

If he were a candidate, if he signed a nomination paper, if he delivered a leaflet, then there would be anti-racist demonstrations on the streets of Lanchester, including outside people's houses.

Protesters would be brought in from around the country, and beyond.

You think I'm kidding? Try me, bitches. Try me.

The best thing that Labour could do for him would be to keep him out of the country between the beginning of the third week in March, and the end of the second week in May.

Then again, another opportunity may be about to present itself.

Loathe though I am to inflict him as a constituency neighbour on my old Durham mate, Jonathan Ashworth, how about Neil Fleming for Leicester East?

He could share his charming views on race with the electorate at that by-election.


  1. I've never been convinced Neil Fleming was real, I reckon he's a character you've made up.

  2. Then when he doesn't put up he ran away and hid from you. Your greatest achievement has always been convincing people that your enemies were nastier than you.

  3. You're desperate for him to call the Police on you so you can go to Russia Today or the Morning Star and accuse them of racially abusing you on his behalf. Black Lives Matter? Small fry. I wouldn't put it past you to Skype your mates in Russia, Africa, South America and the Middle East. Underneath it all you've always been a complete and utter bastard.

  4. Ordering one of your enemies to leave the country for two months so he can't campaign against you in an election? The trouble with David Lindsay is that he thinks he's David Lindsay.

  5. All your enemies are older than you, even Fleming by a few months. What are you going to do for entertainment when they are all dead?