By my reckoning, Vladmir Putin must owe me a small fortune. But all I want is 10 grand to stand for Parliament.
There are people who believe these things, you know. Really, truly, honestly believe them. Such souls walk among us.
Political prisoner, activist, journalist, hymn-writer, emerging thinktanker, aspiring novelist, "tribal elder", 2019 parliamentary candidate for North West Durham, 2024 parliamentary candidate for North Durham, Shadow Leader of the Opposition, "Speedboat", "The Cockroach", banned from Twitter so officially more dangerous than the Taliban, eagerly awaiting the second (or possibly third) attempt to murder me.
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