Peter Hitchens I: All You Need To Do Is Think

He writes:

It's Mandelson's law again. I am really, really sick of explaining why people shouldn't vote Tory. So, according to Peter Mandelson (who says that round about the time you're utterly sick of saying something, is when you are beginning to get your message across), I must be almost there. And, like the Gods of the Copybook headings I'll limp up to explain it once more.

One. At the next election, we know you cannot change the government. You are offered a choice between worn-out, ugly Blairites, and fresh, new Blairites, as exciting as, no, less exciting than the choice between Tesco and Sainsbury's.

Two. You can, if you wish, change the opposition. The Tory Party has staked everything on David Cameron, for whom it has abased itself, abandoned any remaining principles and allowed the complete crushing of dissent. It has also, I believe, milked dry all the possible millionaire donors available. If his embrace of every leftist fad available fails to win, then there is nothing left. The party is a shell anyway, its organisation and membership decrepit and scanty. Where will it find the will or the money to endure another four years?

Three. ‘But surely you don't want another four years of Gordon Brown?’ I never wanted a single minute of Gordon Brown, unlike a lot of the most fervent Brown-haters, who rightly feel guilty. Why? Because they voted for New Labour in 1997 and 2000, having been utterly fooled by Anthony Blair, and now take out their anger with themselves by venting it at the Prime Minister. But this isn't a personal matter. It's about politics. What I dislike is not Mr Brown himself, or even Mr Blair (though I do find his creepy fraudulence more offensive than Mr Brown's blatant crassness). What I dislike is the policy they pursue.

And the Tory Party promises to pursue the same one - EU membership, trailing behind the USA in Afghanistan, comprehensive schools, a huge welfare state, refusal to punish or deter wrongdoers, continued open borders, political correctness of all kinds. In a way it might actually be better if this rubbish were pursued by an exhausted and decrepit Labour Party, with a small majority, than by a fresh new Tory cabinet. They might actually do less damage, and get away with less because we're all so sick of them, rather than sycophantically writing wide-eyed articles about what a great Minister Theresa May, or Michael Gove is, and how exciting the new Tory women MPs are. It's in the 18-month honeymoon period that governments do the most damage, because there's so little hostile scrutiny.

Don't you want to punish New Labour? Well, yes, severely, but actually it would be a harder punishment for them to be in office for the next five years than to go off and get directorships in business, or the chairmanships of quangoes, or lucrative speaking engagements - which is what will happen to them if they are put out of office. What's more, letting them run away now would mean that they leave all their mess behind them, and others will have to do the washing up. If they stick around, they will have to clear up at least some of the economic mess they made, and take responsibility for it.

During that time, we, the British people, can put together a new party that speaks for us, that will sweep New Labour and the Cameroon remnant into the sea at an election. Or we can fail to do so. It's up to us. But we will not have the opportunity to do that if we put Mr Cameron and his party in office, because that will save the Tory party and ensure the Blairite succession desired by the BBC and the left-wing establishment.

But who should we vote for? Oh, honestly, why do people bleat so? Why do people insist on having someone to vote 'for'? If there is nobody standing who is 'for' you, why on earth should you vote 'for' them? Voting isn't a sacrament or a magical moment. It's a choice. And if there is no choice, why accept this insult by cooperating in the pretence. The right not to vote is just as valuable as the right to vote, as anyone who has lived in a dictatorship can tell you. And if you must vote, then there are plenty of non-Tory parties available, which are quite respectable even if they are hopeless and will never win power. It's the next election, the one after this, when you might have someone to vote 'for' - but only if you don't save the Useless Tories at this election.

By the way, the suggestion of a trousers-down test to determine who is a conservative was a joke. I should have put a label on, to make this clear. There is no such physical test. Alas.

Are we nearly there yet? All you need to do is think.