Do Not Be Distracted

They had always wanted to do it, but the Epstein Class launched the Iran War to distract from the Epstein Files, and then, via the sacred medium of Melania Trump, they tried to use Jeffrey Epstein to distract from their loss of the Iran War in which Britain was a full participant. America gets Melania, but we get Yvette Cooper. In these dying moments of Lear Starmer, Cooper is positioning herself as the fiftysomething, middle-class woman who must be "the adult in the room". 10 years ago, Theresa May did the same. How did that turn out?

Cooper versus Kemi Badenoch? Can you imagine? Badenoch is trying to take the credit for the abandonment of the Chagos Surrender Bill. Until January, Donald Trump was a supporter of that sellout, which had been negotiated by James Cleverly and which would have gone ahead if the Conservatives had won the last General Election, when Labour would have voted against it. At Third Reading in the House of Lords, the Conservatives failed to table the fatal amendment that would have succeeded in killing off this Bill that had not been in the Labour manifesto, and which indeed directly broke a commitment that was. The responsible Shadow Minister was Andrew Rosindell.

Ah, yes, Reform UK. No one relocates from Hong Kong to London just to donate to a political party. Already pardoned by Trump for violation of the Bank Secrecy Act, Ben Delo is now up against the Chinese approach to such matters, and that does not end in 30 months' probation. Its cryptocurrency links make Reform rich beyond the wildest dreams of any other party, with that income exceedingly difficult to trace. It is therefore in a position to, for example, simply pay a year's energy bills on behalf of two of Nigel Farage's long-serving activists, Ray and June Dibble of Wigan, who have local elections next month, but whose position within the party may or may not protect it from what would otherwise be an open-and-shut case of treating.

But that's showbiz. Time was when this sort of "surprise" doorstep presentation would have been made by Cilla Black or by a member of Coronation Street royalty. Like everything else to do with Reform, the whole event was gloriously in the tradition of Old ITV and of its roots in things like variety, musical hall, and holidays camps. Camp is the word, all right: the razzmatazz, the end-of-the-pier blazers, the celebrity guest appearances, it is no wonder that the Boomers love it. And the money men behind the scenes of all of that were always better left there.

The same was true of football. Does Rupert Lowe even cheer for England? His target electorate could not possibly do so anymore. Restore Britain cannot find any council candidates outside the Great Yarmouth that Lowe was turning into the Brighton of the Indisputably Far Right, but its YouGov debut at four per cent makes it a serious threat to Reform, which holds seats by tiny minorities while being handfuls of votes away from capturing hundreds more.

Still, Restore has a clear brand identity. The Greens, on the other hand, are now trying to position themselves as, of all things, the party of housebuilding. I was very glad that they opposed the two-child benefit cap, but I could not see how that opposition was compatible with anything else for which they had ever stood. And now, this. Although someone might consider telling their existing councillors. And just as Peter Thiel could vote for Reform or Restore, so Noam Chomsky could vote Green, or for Your Party as envisaged by Zarah Sultana, whom Parliament lists as its only MP. Every party in the present House of Commons is an Epstein Class party. Do not be distracted from that.