Colour This

There were many reasons why I could never have been a Labour MP, even before I left the Labour Party in order to do politics instead.

Most obviously, I have the wrong chromosomes. I remember being told by the relevant officer of a very male trade union indeed that, so far as the parliamentary panel was concerned, that union was only interested in women, and that was that. Well, good luck to it with finding any.

I would lose many a game of prolier-than-thou, but the fact remains that I went from a County Durham comp to a non-Oxbridge university, not from an achingly exclusive London pseudo-comp to the Oxbridge college at which my parents met.

I have not been an oddball political obsessive with absolutely no other interest since the age of 12 or even younger. Indeed, I am still not an oddball political obsessive with absolutely no other interest, and I never will be.

I have worked, and do work, outside politics. Ever.

And although my mother is an English-Irish-African-Indian-Chinese-Polynesian with a Scots maiden name, my father was a plain and simple Lowland Scot, complete with being part-Highland and part-Huguenot.

Which brings me to the latest ructions within the remnant Labour Party over the obvious, but officially denied (not least because flagrantly illegal), zoning of what are still inexplicably safe Labour seats, in order to ensure that those where particular ethnic minorities are concentrated return members of those minorities to Parliament.

Can someone please tell me which constituency is reserved for a Scots-English-Irish-African-Indian-Chinese-Polynesian person, and why?