As instructed by CCHQ, the Tories of Central Suffolk and Ipswich North have selected ... oh, someone or other.
As in South West Norfolk, and indeed everywhere else, where is the candidate with an absolute commitment to the monarchy, the organic Constitution, national sovereignty, the Union, the Commonwealth, the countryside, grammar schools, traditional moral and social values, controlled importation and immigration, and a realistic foreign policy, which is a no less absolute, and indeed inseparable, commitment to the Welfare State (including farm subsidies), workers’ rights, consumer protection, the co-operative movement, strong communities, conservation (not environmentalism), fair taxation, full employment, proper local government, a powerful Parliament, and a base of real property from which every household can resist both over-mighty commercial interests and an over-mighty State?
Gosh, what a phone call! I don't know how you got hold of my mobile phone number, but, well, gosh. Let's just say that it is certainly all go in this cause here in North West Durham.