Routine and Manual?

KPMG has set a target of 29 per cent of its senior staff to come from working-class backgrounds. From his own point of view, Boris Johnson needs to issue the following statement, preferably five minutes before Prime Minister’s Questions:

“With the sole exceptions of Members of Parliament who were seeking reelection and of candidates who had already been selected before this moment, all Conservative Party candidates at the next General Election will be drawn, both from the 43 per cent of adults with annual incomes of less than £12,500, and from the 50 per cent of households with annual incomes of less than £25,000. In view of the Queen’s age, every Conservative candidate will sign a personal pledge to maintain the monarchy throughout the next Parliament. I challenge every other Party Leader to match this double undertaking within the hour.

“I apologise for having voted in favour of the war in Iraq, I apologise for that war on behalf of the United Kingdom, I apologise for the war in Libya on behalf of the United Kingdom, I apologise for that war on behalf of the Conservative Party, I challenge Sir Ed Davey to apologise for that war within the hour on behalf of the Liberal Democrats, and I challenge Sir Keir Starmer to repeat within the hour Jeremy Corbyn’s previous apology on behalf of the Labour Party for the war in Iraq.”